Happy Holidays!

This post is a follow-up to THE WAR ON CHRISTMAS post.

The Blog was raised in the Christian church.

The United Church of Christ, to be exact.

Or, as the right wingers like to call it, "That radical, anti-white, anti-American, homo-loving place that the Kenyan, Marxist, Muslim, 'So Called President'  Barack HUSSEIN Obama attended for most of his life."

The Blog's Mom has a degree in theology and has participated in the church in many capacities, from church secretary, to Associate Pastor, to hand-bell choir director.

As a blogling in his late teens, The Blog himself spent a few years as a Sunday school teacher.

The PC learned much from that upbringing. It certainly helped to calibrate his moral compass.

The late, great George Carlin said, "I was raised a Catholic. But, then I grew up."

The older that The Curmudgeon gets, the more he leans toward Atheism.

Not, militant atheism, so much.

I really don't care if our money says, "In God We Trust" on it.

(Although, Jesus might have had an opinion about that. Mark 12:17)

The inclusion of the words "under God" in "The Pledge of Allegiance" don't bother me none.

*Note to Self-- A post about "The Pledge of Allegiance" would be good. Come back to this in the future.*

I don't even care, much, if the city puts up a Nativity scene at City Hall or calls it's tree a "Holiday Tree," a "Christmas Tree," or, as The Blog's own city calls it, the "Angel Tree."

Although, he understands the problem, where the separation of church and state come in. Should Jewish, Muslim, Atheist or other citizens' taxes pay for an exclusively Christian display.

The Blog thinks not.

The Blog's atheistic philosophy does not preclude the idea that, "There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy."

But, "agnostic" is way too wishy-washy a term for my taste.

All of this is a topic for a future post. One that I will probably share when I'm in the mood to REALLY piss a lot of people off.

For the time being, my point is this...

The Blog is an Atheist.

And, despite that fact, like it or not, The Blog LOVES Christmas!

Pretty much everything about it.

Except stringing the lights on the Christmas tree.

Putting lights on the house is fine. Even the chore of untangling the "Gordian's Knot" of icicle lights is just a puzzle to be solved to make the house festive.

The problem with the tree lights, besides the tediousness of the job, is this...

The Blog is allergic to pine trees.

The very act of coming into contact with the pine needles that inject the sap just under the skin (they don't call them needles for nothing) causes the PC's arms and hands to break out in a rash.

Not only that, the pollen from the tree sends The Blog's sinuses into overdrive.

In spite of all of that, your Blog won't give into the temptation to buy an artificial tree.

Because of that pine tree smell. Oh, that smell!

That smell of pine in the house says, "Merry Christmas!" like nothing else can.

And, this atheist refuses to give that up.

                                                          The Blog is, also,  allergic to sanctimonious assholes.

Then, there is the music.

The Blog loves Christmas music.

From the secularist (and, in hindsight, probably very gay) pop of The Mitch Miller Orchestra playing "Jingle Bells" or the songs from the numerous Rankin-Bass TV specials, (not to mention everything from The Partridge Family "Christmas Card" album) to the very Christian renditions of "Angels We Have Heard on High" or "God Rest Ye, Merry Gentlemen." (Especially when performed by the bombastic "Mannheim Steamroller" or the even more bombastic "Trans Siberian Orchestra.")

And, the sound of a small church congregation singing "Silent Night" at a Christmas Eve service can bring The Blog to tears.

Do you know what "Christmas music" The Blog hates?

The hipster, indy pop crap that, at least, one television advertiser uses each year in their commercials. Catchy? Yes. Annoying "ear worms?" Double yes.

This year's offender... KMart.

"The lights, the lights, the lights that light the lights..." and so on...

Last year's offender was CBS Television, spelling out "Jingle Bells" in an annoying and totally addicting manor.

Fortunately, these songs only occupy whatever lobe of the brain entertains this stuff, for about a month. (Although, thanks to Tivo, they can pop up, unexpectedly until March.)

Also, non-Christmas songs that are treated as if they are Christmas songs.

Why, oh why, is "The Sound of Music's" "My Favorite Things" included in so many Christmas music anthologies? Is it "snowflakes on noses" or "brown paper packages, tied up in strings?"

Kind of a stretch.

"My Favorite Things."

The Blog blames Oprah.

As much as it kills The Blog to give points to Wal-Mart for any reason, their adoption of AC/DC's "Back in Black" as their Black Friday theme a year ago, and continuing through this year, is pretty hilarious!

Where was I?

Christmas trees. Christmas music.

Okay.

Gift giving. The Blog loves that.

Gift receiving. Also good!

What else does the atheist Blog love about Christmas?

Give me a second...

While I think about that, I want to mention that "The Holiday Season" begins with Thanksgiving at the end of November.

Or, arguably, on "All Hallow's Eve" at the end of October.

Through New Years Day.

Or, maybe even Orthodox Christmas, sometime in January.

In that time, the Jews, Muslims and Pagans also celebrate holidays.

So, you see? It's not just "The Christmas Season." It is, truly, "The Holiday Season."

And what a joyous thing that is!

Oh! Got it!

The central theme of all of the holidays between Halloween and New Years Day is this....

Peace and goodwill and a celebration of life.

So, the next time someone wishes you "Happy Holidays" or "Season's Greetings," instead of being righteously offended, appreciate that someone has wished you well.

On that note...

The Blog wishes you all Happy Holidays and Season's Greetings.

Whether you like it or not!

IT'S WAR, PEOPLE! WAR, I SAY!

No, it's not.

Bill O'Reily didn't invent the idea of "THE WAR ON CHRISTMAS!."

The last original thing that Bill O' said had to do with mistaking a loofa for a falafel.

The first time that The Blog heard that there was a WAR ON CHRISTMAS was around 2006 while he was perusing that weird book spindle that is always right next to the pharmacy counter at CVS. You know the one. The one that has books with titles like "Twenty Minutes in Hell: A True Journey Into Satan's Realm!" (An actual title.) Or, "10 Ways to Tell Your Children the Preposterous Story of Noah's Ark, As If It Were True!" (Not, I don't think, an actual title. But, something close. I'm spit-balling here.) And anything published by The Blog's friend, Bishop T.D. Jakes.

The paperback pamphlet/book was right there. "THE WAR ON CHRISTMAS!: HOW THE LIBERAL PLOT TO BAN THE SACRED CHRISTIAN HOLIDAY IS WORSE THAN YOU THOUGHT!"  Right next to the book that it was a sequel/companion to, "THE WAR ON CHRISTIANITY!" by the same author.

Amazon.com tells me that the author was one John Gibson.

A Google search shows about 80 gazzilion hits on the phrase "WAR ON CHRISTMAS," leading to 80 gazzilion nut job blogs, so I'll just take Amazon's word for it.

So, the idea originated with John Gibson. (Whoever the hell he is.)

So, back in that year, the producers of Bill O's Fox "News" show booked this nutzoid on his "No Spin Zone" so he could promote his piece of shit pamphlet.

Bill O', never one to miss a potential opportunity to cash in by fleecing his rube viewers, picked up that ball and ran with it.

THE WAR ON CHRISTMAS! became an annual, holiday tradition. And Hannity and Doocey and the rest of the hive mind at Fox climbed on the wagon.

Remember, this was 2006. By November 2009 "THE WAR ON CHRISTMAS! " became "OBAMA'S WAR ON CHRISTMAS!

Because, that's how they roll at Fox "News."

                                            Well, except when they throw their annual, corporate "Holiday Party."

Way back in 2006, Bill O' got his pious ass handed to him by none other than David Letterman over BO's assertion that a school had de-Christianized the Christmas carole "Silent Night."

You can read about it, and watch the video, here...

The quote of that night...

Letterman to O'Reilly...

"I have the feeling about 60 percent of what you say is crap."

60 percent? More like 98 percent.

Six years later, every hair-sprayed Fox "News" weatherman turned pundit from Sean Hannity to Steve Doocey clings to the WAR ON CHRISTMAS myth, the way that rural Pennsylvanians "cling to guns and God."

Yeah, Obama said it! Deal with it. Because it's true.



But, back to Bill...

Earlier this week, the bloviator spewed this blatant lie, for the viewing pleasure of his credulous audience.

Then, just a couple of days ago,  in the weirdest "No Spin" interview ever, Bill O' told an atheist spokesman that "Christianity is not a religion, but a philosophy." And, Jesus was "just a guy."

Really!

Read about it and watch the video here...

For a minute here, Bill O' seems to have confused Christ and Christianity for Buddha and Buddhism.

Bill's "Christian Republican" base has been strangely quiet about this.

Now, the whole thing has been debated ad nauseam here on the internet, on television, the radio, and in books and magazines. Even in the movies. (Search "Bill Maher" and "Ben Stein" on IMDb.)

So much has been said about "Christmas" vs. "Holiday" that there is no real point in rehashing the arguments here.

So, let's move on...

The Blog wants to share a personal story.

As the WAR ON CHRISTMAS rhetoric began to reach a fevered pitch, around 2007, The Blog's mother-in-law came to the City of Angels for a Christmas visit.

On her "To Do List..."

Eat at In-And-Out Burger, dine on hot dogs at Pink's, and visit the Ronald Reagan Library.

Not because she was a Republican. (She isn't.)

But, because she wanted to take a tour of St. Ronnie's "Air Force One."

So, there we were at the Reagan Library. A tribute to Jelly Bellies and Republican spin.

"Jane Wyman, who? Who is that?"

"Ronnie Reagan, jr.? Who is he?"

"Patti Davis in Playboy? Never happened! And, who is this Davis person, anyway?"

The Blog's mom-in-law, a wonderful, unassuming lady, about 75-years-old, at the time, was wearing one of her mom-in-iaw sweatshirts. A stylish, fleecy number with a Santa Claus applique, sewn on the chest.

A fellow visitor, a woman about the same age as Mom-In-Law, stomped up to her and exclaimed, "Merry CHRIST-mas!!!"

She punctuated the first syllable, "CHRIST" with a poke to Santa's pom-pom nose, right at m-i-l's solar plexus.

Too hard to be mistaken for jolly Christmas fun.

Not quite hard enough to be prosecuted as a physical assault.

The visitor flashed the trademarked "Reagan Republican Smirk" as her trademarked "Reagan Republican glassy eyes" showed a momentary spark of superior malevolence.

Then, satisfied, she stomped away.

The Blog's M-I-L, a sweet and somewhat naive lady, stood baffled, not understanding what just happened.

The Blog stood there, nonplussed. Thinking, "Shit! If that sanctimonious bitch was 20 years younger and a man, and had done that to me, she/he would be walking away with an index finger fractured in five places."

Okay.

Your Old Uncle PC has gotten that out of his system.

In the next post, (Unless something more important pops up.) ...

Atheists, Jews, Muslims, and other non-Christians, and why we love Christmas.

(Here is a hint... Peace and Goodwill. It's not just for Christians, anymore.)

Sick Sucks!

Being sick sucks.

And, by "sick," The Blog doesn't mean diarrhea, vomiting, headache or a nose full of snot. He doesn't mean an itchy rash, a sore throat, aching joints and muscles, or just feeling "all around shitty."

Although, to be fair, all of those things DO suck... some.

No, by "sick," I mean, "major organs that no longer work the way that they are supposed to."

I mean, "filling your body with over a dozen controlled poisons (aka: prescription meds) every day, several times a day. Many of which have side effects that can be found referred to in the first, actual, paragraph in this post. Just because suffering those side effects is preferable to the alternative, which is sudden (or slow) death.

*A Brief Aside...*

One of The Blog's most favorite scenes from one of his most favorite TV shows, "House, MD." is the one where Dr. House is doing clinic duty and encounters a mall Santa suffering from diverticulitis. House prescribes "two cigarettes a day." House explains that nicotine has been shown to prevent the symptoms of diverticulitis.

                                           This is true! The Blog once read that in The Reader's Digest.

Santa: But, aren't cigarettes dangerous?

House: Pretty much everything we prescribe is.

*End Aside*

By "sick" I mean, "against every conceivable obstacle, getting all conditions in order, (lowering blood pressure, losing enough weight, and passing a psych evaluation,) to qualify to be put on an organ transplant list, so that, maybe, in a decade or so, the patient might receive a new (well, actually, used, but still working) organ.

By "sick" I mean spending four days a week, three and a half hours at a time, hooked to a machine that sucks our your blood and then puts it back, like some kind of robot vampire.

                                                      Which is, seriously, not as sexy or romantic 
                                                                 as some pop culture shit would have you believe!

By "sick" I mean "...going through your day, just fine. Then finding yourself in a hospital Emergency Room, covered in more blood than Carrie at her prom."

                                                                                      Your own blood. 
                                                                         Not the pig's blood that that asshole 
                                                                           John Travolta dumped on you.

That is what I mean by "sick."

Do you know what else sucks, almost as much?

Being the person whose loved one is that sick.

Never knowing when the one you love is going to spend her/his night screaming, crying and moaning in pain, as you stand by, helpless to do anything to make it better.

Catching the wrath of the miserable, frightened, loved one who "hates you," because you sent her to the hospital, rather than allowing her to sanguinate. (Um... that means, bleed to death.)

*Another Aside...*

Warfarin, also known as Coumadin, is an anti-coagulant used to prevent blood clotting.

According to Wikipedia, "It was initially introduced in 1948 as a pesticide against rats and mice and is still used for this purpose..."

Some months ago, The PC went to the local CVS Pharmacy to pick up Mrs. Blog's Warfarin prescription. He also placed four bottles of Diet Mt. Dew (one of the few soft drinks that a kidney patient is allowed to drink, weirdly,) and a bottle of moderately priced Scotch on the counter.

Pharmacist: I can ring up the Warfarin and the Mt. Dew. But, I am not allowed to ring up the Scotch.

The PC: Seriously? I can pay you, here, for the medical grade rat poison and four bottles of shit that metabolizes into formaldehyde (Google "Aspartame + formaldehyde." I'm not kidding.)

*(Note to self... One of these days, write a post about the history of "NutraSweet, the FDA and the Reagan administration. That will be a good one.)*

The PC continues: But, I have to take the Scotch to another register?

Pharmacist: I know. Right?

*End Aside #2*

So. In light of last night's events, The Blog has some advice for the desperately ill...

I get it. At best, you are frustrated. More likely, you are terrified. You will spend the next few hours being subjected to inconvenience and pain.

Given the alternative, you have to accept this.

You can antagonize the EMTs, piss off the nurses and insult the doctors.

In spite of that, they still have only one goal. And that goal is to save your life. The same goes for your loved one, your caregiver, your spouse.

There is a portion of the brain in every one of those people that is thinking, "Fuck you! Bleed out and die. Just don't do it on our watch." 

But, the EMTs, nurses and doctors don't say that. Because it is their job and responsibility not to.

Your loved one, caregiver, spouse doesn't say it because he/she doesn't want to live without you.

So, suck it up. Because everyone around you is doing their part. You need to do your part, too.

*A Note to the Healthy People...*

If you have not done it already, become an organ donor. Check the box on your driver's license or register with your local hospital. Save a life.

The "WAR ON CHRISTMAS" post is still coming. Give The Blog another day or two. The subject is based on stupidity, addressing stupid people. It's all just stupid. This post feels more important, at the moment. So it took priority.

And, to my Jewish friends, Happy Chanukah! 
 

Another Delay, But, Check This Out! The Worst/Weirdest Christmas Gift, Ever.

The Blog is working on his promised "WAR ON CHRISTMAS" post.

That post is coming. But, The PC is having too much damned fun writing it. And, Bill O'Reily just can't stop himself. He just can't shut the fuck up.

So, The Blog is peddling as fast as he can.

But, Bill O' keeps adding fuel to the fire.

With any luck, The Blog's rant will post tomorrow night.

In the meantime, let me lay this on you... The Worst Christmas Gift, ever.

Or, at least, the weirdest.

A couple of years ago, Mrs. Blog, a school teacher, received this gift from a student.

                                                                         No, seriously!

Now,The PC does not mean to denigrate the gift, itself.

As "they" say, "It's the thought that counts." And, the thought was sincere.

But, WTF?

Two plastic pigs, climbing over each other, in a totally not sexual way, (right?)  to hold wine glasses.

What does this mean?

I don't know.

If you, my Blogglitts have any thoughts about this, please share them.

Or, if you have a bad gift, or a weird one, share it with The Blog in the comments section.


 Let's have some fun here!

Sorry For the Delay

The Blog spent way too much time, tonight, dicking around on Facebook. trying to, finally, change his "cover photo" to a pic of the young Blogling with Santa.

The good news is, The Blog finally succeeded.

                                                                                    Here it is, if you care.

The bad news is, The Blog's newest post is only half written.

I promise that it will be posted tomorrow night.

Thank you for your patience.

B,B,B, & B (Part Whatever...)

At this point, this is all starting to feel like old news.

The friend who posted the original question has made it clear that she has no interest in what I have to say, and will no longer read this blog.

So fine.

So, a quick summation...

"Papa John" offered a half-assed apology and a major back pedal on his position on "Obamacare" on the Huffington post. Feel free to look it up.

Wal-Mart heir, Alice Walton, posted a press release standing with striking Wal-Mart workers.

Cynical PR move? Or, an admission of a clueless disconnect from the "little people" who have made her wealthy? We may never know.

Hostess shuts down business. Blames the baker's union. Gives multi-million dollar bonuses to their upper level suits while filing  bankruptcy. Hostess owners, hedge fund, corporate raiders, aka "Vulture Capitalists" sell off assets while putting thousands our of work. They don't care. They made their millions.

Costco thrives while paying their employees a living wage and health benefits, and the CEO takes no more than half a million dollars in compensation. Proving that capitalism works if ethics are included in the mix.

You can fact check all of this with a few minutes on Google.

The Blog is too fucking over it to do your homework for you.

Go! Learn! Have fun!

The Blog will be back tomorrow with the post that he has waited almost a year to write. Be here when The Blog rants about the so called "War on Christmas!"

See you then!

Billionaires, Bakers, Bankruptcy and Backpedalling (Part Two)

Now... Where was I?

Oh, right! Sorry. I got distracted by Angus Jones for a few minutes.

At this point, I guess I should continue on with my commenter's, uhm, comments.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with working our way to the top and accumulating massive amounts of wealth...

My friend is absolutely right about this! She and I are in agreement 100%!

There is nothing wrong with working your way to the top. And there is nothing wrong with enjoying the fruits of ones success.

But....

There is something deeply, morally, ethically wrong with achieving that success or protecting your personal profit margin by short changing the hard working employees who you could not have achieved that success without.

There is nothing right about trading in your mansion for a compound, buying a second personal jet and adding four more classic cars to your collection while laying off employees, cutting the remaining employee's benefits (and tripling their workload) and raising the price of the product you are selling to your customers, because, "Things are tough all over."

The Blog personally witnessed the following conversation between an employee and the company's CFO a couple of years ago....

Employee: How was your Christmas vacation?

CFO: Miserable! We are having our kitchen and dining room remodeled and it has taken longer than we expected. We had to spend the whole holiday at the Ritz Carlton. It was awful.

What makes this exchange galling is that the employee, a divorced mother of two (who was, frankly, just trying to make polite conversation) was, at the time, in the middle of fighting the foreclosure of her house, due to the fact that the CFO in question had cut her annual income by a third the previous year, in order to keep the company's profit margin at status quo.

The employee in this story walked a way, at that point, and cried.

*A quick digression*

In many cases, one of the main jobs of a company's CFO is to keep the CEO out of the loop where employee wages are concerned. In a, sort of, defense of CEOs, many CEOs would be appalled if they knew how little their employees were being paid. On the other hand, that's why they employ CFOs.

*end digression*

Moving on...

I think Poppa John's has great food...

Well, that is a subjective opinion. I think Poppa John's pizza sucks.

To be fair, I'm not a fan of Pizza Hut pizza or Dominos, though both are better, IMO, than Poppa John's. Also, to be fair, I think Poppa John's is superior to Numero Uno, Godfather's, Little Caesar's and Chuck E. Cheese.

But, that's not saying much.

Poppa John does a lot of charity work.

Sure he does. And that's good! So do most corporations and multi-millionaires.

Philanthropic foundations are a great tax shelter. And, it's cheaper PR than any television ad buy. The fact that they get to support some of their pet charities in the process is almost accidental.

Call me a cynic, but it's true.

Philanthropy is a good thing, whatever the motivation. I'm all for it!

Is it fair that he (Poppa John) doesn't want to pitch in a few cents for healthcare?

No. It's not. It is also short sighted. Sick employees are unproductive employees. Full time or part time. Employee healthcare is a win/win situation.

"Poppa John" has backpedaled on his comments. I'll get to that in "Part Three."

See you here tomorrow.