100th Post

In the world of television production, the 100th episode would be celebrated in many ways.

Certainly a cake for the cast and crew. And T-shirts and/or mugs commemorating the occasion. Probably a very special guest star. (At best, George Clooney. At worst, Pauley Shore.) Definitely a tape piece on "Entertainment Tonight" and a small blurb in "Entertainment Weekly."

In an elementary school class, the 100th day would be celebrated with 100 M&Ms, funny paper glasses that say "100" and, probably, a cake.

So, here it is, The Blog's 100th post.

The blog has 9 members. (One of them seems to be registered twice, so, really, only 8. But, that's okay.) An average of 15 visitors a day. Some of them friends and family. But, a small handful from all over the world. That's kinda cool!

No cake. Sorry. No T-shirts or M&Ms.

No George Clooney.

But, make no mistake. The Premature Curmudgeon is grateful for everyone who has stopped by to visit.

The PC has amused some of you. Thank you for your comments here on the blog, on his Facebook page and in person. I appreciate your feedback!

The PC has pissed a few of you off. That's cool. Fuck you! I appreciated you too.

But, sadly, no cake.

Or T-shirts.

Tomorrow, The Blog will post his 101st post.

And, I promise you, it's going to be a fucking mind blower!

See you tomorrow!

A Missed Anniversary

Well, Hell!

The Blog has been so busy snarking, kvetching and referring to himself in the third person that he completely missed the big anniversary earlier this week.

                May 21, 2012. The one year anniversary of The Rapture That Didn't Happen!

Did you forget, too? I wouldn't be too surprised.

Judgement Day 2011 was to the early 21st Century what the comet Kohoutek was to the 1970's.

                                         If you understand this reference, congratulations! You are old!

The Blog wasn't blogging at this time last year. If he had been, he probably would have written a six part series spanning three months (March, April and May) with a follow up in October.

Because, DAMN, it was a laugh riot! Nothing anywhere near as weird as last year's Rapturepalooza has happened in the past 12 months, except for, maybe, the Republican primary race.

Around February or March of last year, billboards like these started going up all over the country.

Weird, yes. But no weirder than the World Net Daily "birther" billboards. The world is full of crackpots with money to burn.

What was really weird was that so many people across America were buying into it.

I mean, I get that many branches of the Christian church believe that, one of these days, Jesus will return to Earth and believers will be plucked right out of their shoes....

                                                                                  ...and moving vehicles...
...and transported to Heaven for Final Judgement. So, it really isn't so strange, I suppose, that an alarming number of people might just take the warnings seriously and start giving away their belongings, running up credit cards, traumatizing their children and paying entrepreneurial non-believers a retainer to take care of their pets after they have been sucked up to the Heavens.

No. The strangest part of all was that all of this hysteria was stirred up by...

                                                                         This guy.

The Blog's Facebook post on May 17th, 2011 said this....

Harold Camping, the founder of Family Radio Worldwide, says the Apocalypse will begin at about 6 p.m., on Saturday with a series of tremendous earthquakes that will follow the sun around for 24 hours. Then things get really bad. (Camping also predicted the world would end September 6, 1994, but he’s got a good feeling this time around.)

Yep! A 180-year-old radio guy.

(The PC probably has a whole other post in him about the baffling fact that cult leaders tend to be, not the charismatic rock gods that one would imagine, but rather, dorky little trolls who were probably picked on in school by the school nerds.)

There was some speculation, at the time, (even by some of his own employees) that Camping was a con artist and that the only one disappearing on May 21st would be Camping himself. Along with about 70 million dollars!

As it turned out, Camping was really just a delusional old coot who, rather than having the good sense to disappear, instead re-calibrated his "prophecy" to October 21st.

*SPOILER ALERT*

He was wrong about that date, too!

But, oh he had people believing! Here is a photo taken by The Blog himself, on May 19th, the run up to Armageddon. 

A year (+ four days) later, we're still here. Most of us, anyway. And those who are no longer with us didn't leave behind smoking shoes.

But, a year later, The Blog is still chuckling over his favorite thing to come out of it all.

There is a Seventh Day Adventist Church about a block from The Blog's house. For as long as I have lived in the area, a small marquise sign at the church's parking lot entrance has read, "Jesus is Returning Soon."

But, on the morning of May 22, 2011, the good humored folks at 7th Day had altered the sign. This is an actual photo taken by your Uncle PC that morning. Not one of those fake church signs you see on the internets.

  
 

Some New Propaganda

In past posts, The Blog has mentioned the steaming piles of shit that are shoveled into his email inbox by the Right-Wing propagandists on a daily basis.

The shovel loads of bovine excrement arrive from groups calling themselves, "Townhall Spotlight," "Right Change," "Conservative Action Alerts" and, The Blog's favorite, "The Christian Response."

The most fascinating thing about this crap is, each email is absolutely identical to the last. It's all "cut, paste and clone." One propaganda machine gets ahold of a "story" the rest waste no time parroting it.

Today, no less than four Right-wing propaganda machines shat out the following...

                                               Oh and the email goes on and on to the point of losing it's topic.
                                                                       I won't post any more of it here. 
                                        I will not allow the insult to my Bloglitts intelligence to go any further.
Seriously?

The folks who were all on board for "The Patriot Act," "indefinite detention" and "extreme interrogation techniques" are now warning us that "The Kenyan {read "nigger"} in the Whitehouse" is going to declare "martial law" in America, according to an "anonymous whistle blower" at the DHS.

President Obama and his spokespeople won't lower themselves to respond to these scumbags. Nor, should they.

But, I will.

The Blog calls 'em as he sees 'em!

Extreme "conservatives," "Tea Partyers" Fundamentalist, Evangelical "Christians," and Ayn Randians."

Just a bunch of fucking hypocrites, bigots and liars.

That is all.

The Fundamentalist Christian's Solution

Hey Bloglitts! It's "Two-fer Tuesday!"

That's right! A rare, second post from your ole Uncle PC!

Another fundamentalist, North Carolina pastor has chimed in on the subject of "Lesbians and Queers."

Check out this video, via the HuffPo, of the Reverend Charles L. Worely, preaching on the subject.

Go. Watch. As always, I will be here when you get back.

So, what do you, my Bloglitts, think about this?

If you listen closely, you can almost here the strains of "Dueling Banjos."

The Blog doesn't know quite what to make of the dozens of empty chairs behind the pastor. But, judging from the audio, the Reverend Worely has, maybe a dozen members in his congregation.

And, even though The Blog is an avowed atheist, The Blog will let you in on a little secret.

God speaks directly to The Blog!....  It's true!

And God spoketh to The Blog and said, "Tell that fucking, illiterate, pious, asshole and his half dozen followers that God thinks that he is a mealy mouthed piece of shit. And, the word is "against" not "agin." And that God thinks he is a fucking hillbilly who should stop pretending that he speaks for me!"

On the Subject of Bumper Stickers

The Blog, as you, my blogglitts know, likes bumper stickers.

Bumper stickers were "wall posts" before Facebook was invented.

The Blog's car has sported one sticker or another for years. Often political, sometimes, not. An Obama sticker today, a Batman logo before that.

In fact, The Blog's car currently rocks a "We are the 99%" sticker. In the next day or two, I will be peeling it off and replacing it with a nifty new one that I received in today's mail, that reads, "Not Republican."

(Because, in case you have not caught on... The Blog is SO not Republican!)

But, The Blog has a theory about bumper stickers.

Bumper stickers are like cats.

If you have one or two, that's fine. If you have a whole ass load of them, your sanity is in question.

Even though The Blog likes cats. And even if The Blog agrees with your political perspective.

                                                                          Like this dude.
Because, even if I agree with virtually everything expressed on the back of this car (and, I do!)...

Seriously. Not only is this guy (yes, The Blog is being sexist, assuming that the owner of this car is male, because he probably is) is coming off as the sort that writes in the margins of the letters that he sends to his Congressmen, he is, also, totally fucking up his paint job, when the time comes, win or lose, that he has to remove them.

All in all, not helping the cause.

The "take home" is this....

One or two bumper stickers. Three, max. Otherwise, you strain credibility. And, if you are on the right side of the argument, you need to be credible to represent.

And, The Blog is hoping that in the near future, he will capture photos of the three Tea Bagger's pick-up trucks that drive around the Los Angeles South Bay that look like fucking parade floats, and make the above photo look like a single cat owner!

My Bumper Sticker Collection, Part 3

If you have been following my posts for a while, you know that The Blog loves weird bumper stickers.

While driving to the bank, this morning, I came across this one.

The quality of the pic is poor. The Blog took it with his iPhone while driving.*

*The Blog does not endorse the habit of taking photos while driving. Do not try this yourself.

The car was a bit too far a way. The Blog attempted to enhance the bumper sticker in Photoshop to make it clearer, but, regardless of what you see on "CSI: Wherever" and "NCIS" there is no magic program to properly enhance low definition photos.

In case you can't make it out, the bumper sticker says this...

 "TRUST GOD Anyway."

The Blog's past bumper sticker posts have highlighted clueless right-wing ideologies. They were almost too easy to make fun of.

But, this one, well, The Blog isn't sure what to make of it.

 "TRUST GOD Anyway." ?!?!?

As far as The Blog can figure, this sticker says, "I trust God, but, I can't really tell you why. So, just go with it."

I don't know if it represents blind faith, or a sort of befuddled agnosticism.

The Blog is stumped!

Any ideas about this?

It's Over James. It's Over.

This week, internet "journalist" (in the sense of "convicted felon, shithead, video blogger") James O'Keefe posted his "proof" of "massive voter fraud" got royally "pwned" (as the kids say today.)

Which raises the question, "Why didn't this parasite die with his host Andrew Breitbart?"

The Blog doesn't have an answer for that question, beyond the theory that cockroaches will survive Armageddon.

Much like Al Queda, the Pimp Daddy of right-wing propagandists, O'Keefe, had one spectacularly successful take down of his enemy, followed by numerous, lame ass attempts that failed, hilariously.

Yesterday's attempt was debunked so fast that "The Flash" is wondering, "WTF just happened?"

Here's the story.

Give it up Jimbo. Even the people you think that you are fighting for have given up on you.