Friday, June 20, 2014

My Visit to the Doctor

So, I went to the doctor this morning, to tell him that the massive doses of ibuprofen that he prescribed for the arthritis in my right foot worked for about a month, but no more.

"So," he asked. "Do you want a shot?"

"You're the doctor, you tell me." I replied. "If that's the next move, let's do it."

As I watched him prepare the syringe, I asked, "I notice that you are drawing from two vials. What's that about?"

"One vial is cortisone, the other is Novocain. The cortisone will help for one to six months, but will take a couple of days to kick in. The Novocain will take the pain away for a couple of hours. But it will wear off."

And he was right. For the next four hours or so, I was without pain, (in my foot at least. Absent the foot pain, I found that I was noticing my knee pain for the first time in quite a while.)

I said, "I work on a TV show with a bunch of doctors, so I tend to ask a lot of questions."

"That's okay," he said. "What show do you work on?"

"The Doctors," I said.

"I love that show!" He replied. "I watch it whenever I get the chance."

YESSS! I love it when non-TV doctors praise my show.

Where was I?

Oh, right.

I watched him stick the needle in my foot and did not pass out. Which I could not have done, six years ago.

Working on The Doctors, I have seen things that no one who doesn't have a degree in medicine should ever see. I have become amazingly desensitized to gruesome medical procedures.

As promised, for a couple of hours, I could have tap danced.

And, as promised, the effects of the Novocain began to wear off.

And here is the part that he didn't warn me about.

Not only did the foot pain return, it was accompanied by a "pins and needles" pain. And, instead of spending my afternoon doing planed yard work, I, instead, sat in my recliner, watching my foot do an impression of Linda Blair in "The Exorcist," twisting and turning at unnatural angles, completely out of my control.


The pins and needles have passed. Hope the steroid kicks in soon.

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