Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Happy Holidays!

This post is a follow-up to THE WAR ON CHRISTMAS post.

The Blog was raised in the Christian church.

The United Church of Christ, to be exact.

Or, as the right wingers like to call it, "That radical, anti-white, anti-American, homo-loving place that the Kenyan, Marxist, Muslim, 'So Called President'  Barack HUSSEIN Obama attended for most of his life."

The Blog's Mom has a degree in theology and has participated in the church in many capacities, from church secretary, to Associate Pastor, to hand-bell choir director.

As a blogling in his late teens, The Blog himself spent a few years as a Sunday school teacher.

The PC learned much from that upbringing. It certainly helped to calibrate his moral compass.

The late, great George Carlin said, "I was raised a Catholic. But, then I grew up."

The older that The Curmudgeon gets, the more he leans toward Atheism.

Not, militant atheism, so much.

I really don't care if our money says, "In God We Trust" on it.

(Although, Jesus might have had an opinion about that. Mark 12:17)

The inclusion of the words "under God" in "The Pledge of Allegiance" don't bother me none.

*Note to Self-- A post about "The Pledge of Allegiance" would be good. Come back to this in the future.*

I don't even care, much, if the city puts up a Nativity scene at City Hall or calls it's tree a "Holiday Tree," a "Christmas Tree," or, as The Blog's own city calls it, the "Angel Tree."

Although, he understands the problem, where the separation of church and state come in. Should Jewish, Muslim, Atheist or other citizens' taxes pay for an exclusively Christian display.

The Blog thinks not.

The Blog's atheistic philosophy does not preclude the idea that, "There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy."

But, "agnostic" is way too wishy-washy a term for my taste.

All of this is a topic for a future post. One that I will probably share when I'm in the mood to REALLY piss a lot of people off.

For the time being, my point is this...

The Blog is an Atheist.

And, despite that fact, like it or not, The Blog LOVES Christmas!

Pretty much everything about it.

Except stringing the lights on the Christmas tree.

Putting lights on the house is fine. Even the chore of untangling the "Gordian's Knot" of icicle lights is just a puzzle to be solved to make the house festive.

The problem with the tree lights, besides the tediousness of the job, is this...

The Blog is allergic to pine trees.

The very act of coming into contact with the pine needles that inject the sap just under the skin (they don't call them needles for nothing) causes the PC's arms and hands to break out in a rash.

Not only that, the pollen from the tree sends The Blog's sinuses into overdrive.

In spite of all of that, your Blog won't give into the temptation to buy an artificial tree.

Because of that pine tree smell. Oh, that smell!

That smell of pine in the house says, "Merry Christmas!" like nothing else can.

And, this atheist refuses to give that up.

                                                          The Blog is, also,  allergic to sanctimonious assholes.

Then, there is the music.

The Blog loves Christmas music.

From the secularist (and, in hindsight, probably very gay) pop of The Mitch Miller Orchestra playing "Jingle Bells" or the songs from the numerous Rankin-Bass TV specials, (not to mention everything from The Partridge Family "Christmas Card" album) to the very Christian renditions of "Angels We Have Heard on High" or "God Rest Ye, Merry Gentlemen." (Especially when performed by the bombastic "Mannheim Steamroller" or the even more bombastic "Trans Siberian Orchestra.")

And, the sound of a small church congregation singing "Silent Night" at a Christmas Eve service can bring The Blog to tears.

Do you know what "Christmas music" The Blog hates?

The hipster, indy pop crap that, at least, one television advertiser uses each year in their commercials. Catchy? Yes. Annoying "ear worms?" Double yes.

This year's offender... KMart.

"The lights, the lights, the lights that light the lights..." and so on...

Last year's offender was CBS Television, spelling out "Jingle Bells" in an annoying and totally addicting manor.

Fortunately, these songs only occupy whatever lobe of the brain entertains this stuff, for about a month. (Although, thanks to Tivo, they can pop up, unexpectedly until March.)

Also, non-Christmas songs that are treated as if they are Christmas songs.

Why, oh why, is "The Sound of Music's" "My Favorite Things" included in so many Christmas music anthologies? Is it "snowflakes on noses" or "brown paper packages, tied up in strings?"

Kind of a stretch.

"My Favorite Things."

The Blog blames Oprah.

As much as it kills The Blog to give points to Wal-Mart for any reason, their adoption of AC/DC's "Back in Black" as their Black Friday theme a year ago, and continuing through this year, is pretty hilarious!

Where was I?

Christmas trees. Christmas music.


Gift giving. The Blog loves that.

Gift receiving. Also good!

What else does the atheist Blog love about Christmas?

Give me a second...

While I think about that, I want to mention that "The Holiday Season" begins with Thanksgiving at the end of November.

Or, arguably, on "All Hallow's Eve" at the end of October.

Through New Years Day.

Or, maybe even Orthodox Christmas, sometime in January.

In that time, the Jews, Muslims and Pagans also celebrate holidays.

So, you see? It's not just "The Christmas Season." It is, truly, "The Holiday Season."

And what a joyous thing that is!

Oh! Got it!

The central theme of all of the holidays between Halloween and New Years Day is this....

Peace and goodwill and a celebration of life.

So, the next time someone wishes you "Happy Holidays" or "Season's Greetings," instead of being righteously offended, appreciate that someone has wished you well.

On that note...

The Blog wishes you all Happy Holidays and Season's Greetings.

Whether you like it or not!

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