Monday, December 10, 2012
IT'S WAR, PEOPLE! WAR, I SAY!
No, it's not.
Bill O'Reily didn't invent the idea of "THE WAR ON CHRISTMAS!."
The last original thing that Bill O' said had to do with mistaking a loofa for a falafel.
The first time that The Blog heard that there was a WAR ON CHRISTMAS was around 2006 while he was perusing that weird book spindle that is always right next to the pharmacy counter at CVS. You know the one. The one that has books with titles like "Twenty Minutes in Hell: A True Journey Into Satan's Realm!" (An actual title.) Or, "10 Ways to Tell Your Children the Preposterous Story of Noah's Ark, As If It Were True!" (Not, I don't think, an actual title. But, something close. I'm spit-balling here.) And anything published by The Blog's friend, Bishop T.D. Jakes.
The paperback pamphlet/book was right there. "THE WAR ON CHRISTMAS!: HOW THE LIBERAL PLOT TO BAN THE SACRED CHRISTIAN HOLIDAY IS WORSE THAN YOU THOUGHT!" Right next to the book that it was a sequel/companion to, "THE WAR ON CHRISTIANITY!" by the same author.
Amazon.com tells me that the author was one John Gibson.
A Google search shows about 80 gazzilion hits on the phrase "WAR ON CHRISTMAS," leading to 80 gazzilion nut job blogs, so I'll just take Amazon's word for it.
So, the idea originated with John Gibson. (Whoever the hell he is.)
So, back in that year, the producers of Bill O's Fox "News" show booked this nutzoid on his "No Spin Zone" so he could promote his piece of shit pamphlet.
Bill O', never one to miss a potential opportunity to cash in by fleecing his rube viewers, picked up that ball and ran with it.
THE WAR ON CHRISTMAS! became an annual, holiday tradition. And Hannity and Doocey and the rest of the hive mind at Fox climbed on the wagon.
Remember, this was 2006. By November 2009 "THE WAR ON CHRISTMAS! " became "OBAMA'S WAR ON CHRISTMAS!
Because, that's how they roll at Fox "News."
Well, except when they throw their annual, corporate "Holiday Party."
Way back in 2006, Bill O' got his pious ass handed to him by none other than David Letterman over BO's assertion that a school had de-Christianized the Christmas carole "Silent Night."
You can read about it, and watch the video, here...
The quote of that night...
Letterman to O'Reilly...
"I have the feeling about 60 percent of what you say is crap."
60 percent? More like 98 percent.
Six years later, every hair-sprayed Fox "News" weatherman turned pundit from Sean Hannity to Steve Doocey clings to the WAR ON CHRISTMAS myth, the way that rural Pennsylvanians "cling to guns and God."
Yeah, Obama said it! Deal with it. Because it's true.
But, back to Bill...
Earlier this week, the bloviator spewed this blatant lie, for the viewing pleasure of his credulous audience.
Then, just a couple of days ago, in the weirdest "No Spin" interview ever, Bill O' told an atheist spokesman that "Christianity is not a religion, but a philosophy." And, Jesus was "just a guy."
Read about it and watch the video here...
For a minute here, Bill O' seems to have confused Christ and Christianity for Buddha and Buddhism.
Bill's "Christian Republican" base has been strangely quiet about this.
Now, the whole thing has been debated ad nauseam here on the internet, on television, the radio, and in books and magazines. Even in the movies. (Search "Bill Maher" and "Ben Stein" on IMDb.)
So much has been said about "Christmas" vs. "Holiday" that there is no real point in rehashing the arguments here.
So, let's move on...
The Blog wants to share a personal story.
As the WAR ON CHRISTMAS rhetoric began to reach a fevered pitch, around 2007, The Blog's mother-in-law came to the City of Angels for a Christmas visit.
On her "To Do List..."
Eat at In-And-Out Burger, dine on hot dogs at Pink's, and visit the Ronald Reagan Library.
Not because she was a Republican. (She isn't.)
But, because she wanted to take a tour of St. Ronnie's "Air Force One."
So, there we were at the Reagan Library. A tribute to Jelly Bellies and Republican spin.
"Jane Wyman, who? Who is that?"
"Ronnie Reagan, jr.? Who is he?"
"Patti Davis in Playboy? Never happened! And, who is this Davis person, anyway?"
The Blog's mom-in-law, a wonderful, unassuming lady, about 75-years-old, at the time, was wearing one of her mom-in-iaw sweatshirts. A stylish, fleecy number with a Santa Claus applique, sewn on the chest.
A fellow visitor, a woman about the same age as Mom-In-Law, stomped up to her and exclaimed, "Merry CHRIST-mas!!!"
She punctuated the first syllable, "CHRIST" with a poke to Santa's pom-pom nose, right at m-i-l's solar plexus.
Too hard to be mistaken for jolly Christmas fun.
Not quite hard enough to be prosecuted as a physical assault.
The visitor flashed the trademarked "Reagan Republican Smirk" as her trademarked "Reagan Republican glassy eyes" showed a momentary spark of superior malevolence.
Then, satisfied, she stomped away.
The Blog's M-I-L, a sweet and somewhat naive lady, stood baffled, not understanding what just happened.
The Blog stood there, nonplussed. Thinking, "Shit! If that sanctimonious bitch was 20 years younger and a man, and had done that to me, she/he would be walking away with an index finger fractured in five places."
Your Old Uncle PC has gotten that out of his system.
In the next post, (Unless something more important pops up.) ...
Atheists, Jews, Muslims, and other non-Christians, and why we love Christmas.
(Here is a hint... Peace and Goodwill. It's not just for Christians, anymore.)