Probably would have been ready tonight.
Your PC went and saw "The Lego Movie," (henceforth referred to "TLM" for simplicity,) tonight.
Because of that, his brain is a little bit mushy at the moment.
For several reasons.
First... How do I describe this?
Have you ever gone on the "Indiana Jones" ride at Disneyland?
You are flying along a bumpy track, shit flying at you from every direction. You don't know where to look, and no matter where you do look, you have missed six other things. When it's over, you feel like you have to get right back in line and do it again.
(If you have never taken the Indy ride, and have ten minutes to kill, this YouTube™ video doesn't do it justice. But, it will give you an idea.)
One blogger compared "TLM" to a riding a ride at Cedar Point. As an ex-pat Ohioan, that warms my nostalgic heart.
A total assault on the senses.
But, in a good way.
That's what "The Lego Movie" is like.
A dozen visual gags in every shot, in addition to the joke filled main dialogue and scatter-shot pop culture references.
The Blog predicts that DVD sales of "TLM" will be off the charts, so people can watch it with their finger on the pause/slow motion button.
Many reviewers have described the movie's plot as "subversive." That always gets The PC's attention.
The usual right-wing suspects have gone ballistic, dragging out the same tired criticism that they flogged when Disney's "The Muppets" came out last year.
While I will not post any "spoilers" here, if you are particularly sensitive to "semi-spoilers" as I am, you may want to skip the next few paragraphs, which I will post in red text. You can come back when the text turns back to black."Hollywood liberal, anti-corporate, anti-business indoctrination of impressionable children," they are whining.
The right-wing punditry pout-rage suggests that none of them have actually seen the movie.
The movie's villain is "Lord Business" aka: "President Business."
And there is a definite cautionary tale about letting business control government.
But, in the end, the message is truly "fair and balanced."
Sometimes, discarding the directions and thinking outside the box is the way to go.
But, sometimes, having a plan and working as a team is the way to get things done.
Both philosophies are good and valid.
But... and here is where the punditry misses the point...
It's all a red herring designed to distract you until...
A plot twist late in the movie that is so huge...
That the term "plot twist" feels insufficient to describe what happens next.
If you are one those men (or women) of a certain age, who needed the last eight minutes of "Toy Story 3" to pull your shit together, be warned! The producers of "TLM" will not afford you that luxury.
"No, I'm not crying. It just rained on my face, a little bit. Inside the theater."For the sake of your dignity...
Run, do not walk, to the nearest restroom. Splash some water on your face and take a few deep breaths, before you rejoin your family in the lobby.
Okay, you can come back now.
Finally, the biggest offender in "TLM's" brain-fuck is the movie's theme song.
In the movie, the song is the only and official song of "President Business'" Lego world.
A catchy bit of musical propaganda designed to brainwash the Lego populace.
In the real world, the song, penned by Mark Mothersbaugh...
Yes, THAT Mark Mothersbaugh...
Is the most insidious ear-worm ever.
If you can leave the theater without "Everything Is Awesome" pummeling every lobe and cortex of your brain...
You are stronger than I am.
The world is still full of gun toting assholes with anger management issues and idiotic politicians and pundits.
But, just for tonight...
Thanks to a crazy, silly movie...